Hello again, better a bit late than never, I don't have time to make so much as a squeak or even a 'rude bottom noise' anymore. I am either driving to work, working, driving home or asleep yep or driving whilst dreaming, I've pretty much got the life I've always wanted NOT. As the song said years ago 'where is my furry sun where have all the cowboys gone?' It's manic at work and this heat tends to bring out the worst in people. Rudeness is never acceptable, we are all hot, we all wish we were on the beach, we all need to learn manners as they cost nowt and could make somebodies day!!
Take a few days ago - I was walking outside trying to get a bit of a break when I was sent flying by a student - unsure of nationality but Italian I think. He never even apologised he looked at me and ran off leaving me on the pavement looking like a bundle of washing - damp washing at that. I struggled back to work and decided that I would not venture out again without my stick incase it happens again. My stick is not my friend it gives me blisters and makes me feel even more vulnerable - it's almost like a target for 'would be' assassins like him but I'm resigned to the fact it is becoming a necessity.
I love my job - I like the people and for the first time also my manager but I have given up on the trains (made me hurt) what a faff they are and expensive! Late hot and stuffed full of morons even dear old Amy Winehouse on headphones couldn't drown out the misery so I vowed I would no longer use them and have driven ever since. My radio is my friend and we chat most of the way - I laugh - answer them and arrive at work refreshed and in a good mood rather than the headachy mess I was before. I no longer have to listen to idiots shouting into mobiles or eating pasties at 7am - oh yes that happens - nor do I have the horrendous struggle to the office from the station. Until the rail companies do something about 'not so quiet' carriages and the cost I would rather drive - in fact I'd rather stick pins under my finger nails but that's another story.
Weekends now consist of food shopping at night (Aspie thing for Jon) housework and nail painting and the over whelming urge to eat my body weight in Percy pigs the best thing to come out if M&S since the sliced loaf. How can their profits fall when the whole country eats them? Their clothes i feel are out dated and expensive but Percy and his friends are fab. Colin the caterpillar comes a close second by the way but Percy is my favourite. He even has a FB page!
I've got a few reasons to be proud of myself as I have learnt another computer system at work and that's with fibro brain plus I have learnt my new title is a 'fibromite'. Isn't that dreadful how people have to be labeled in some way and how suddenly the hash tag becomes so important on the tweets that they type. I don't feel the need to do this - yes I'm disabled - yes I'm in chronic pain but I'm also me and I am not defined by my conditions. Neither am I under any illusion that I will get any better but there is so much more to me than fibromyalgia - there is the arthritis as well !! Lol but seriously I don't feel the need for a label. If you like me or don't like me for that matter its because of what's in or out of my head not because I've got this horrible condition.
For a long time now I have watched this government and their treatment of disabled people - I have watched their smug grins during the Olympics as the athletes won awards for this country plus the how proud are we speeches. The shambles that is the ATOS controversy of assessments since is heart breaking - how suddenly paralympians are relegated from hero status - now they have become virtual scroungers and are having the most appalling time since. I myself have had a taste of it last Monday and its a bitter taste I tell you. What this country is doing to disability is in my opinion a crime whilst I agree a few people do swing the lead as it where an awful lot more are genuinely loosing out on money they need to live, work and live a normal life. I feel this government is taking us back to the dark ages with their opinions and views that are so out dated its shocking. I feel that ATOS HCP's appear to be declaring most people fit for work, a lot of them are not and a lot have died because of stress etc and of those who appeal about half go on to win. This costs the country more than the benefit would in the first place!! How does that work? So a doc can treat a patient for most of their life yet does not know as much as an ATOS HCP who interviews them for an hour guided by 'set questions' and gives them silly tasks to do. I have since been told that moving forward when appealing that doctors will not be encouraged or even banned to aid the patient with the evidence of their condition either. I feel this is possibly the worst case of a government cover up I've ever seen? Even the debate in parliament where MP Liam Byrne spoke so brilliantly seemed to have been sabotaged by late comers - if you don't sit in the debate you shouldn't be able to vote? - did you see that ? Maybe they would prefer as all to disappear totally it makes me so bloody angry. Anyway enough about that I try to keep politics off here as its not about that, but I felt I had to say something as it borders on a national disgrace or 'eugenics' by the front door as its not even hidden.
Why is it in this heat people feel the need to expose white bits? White bits that let's be honest are not the prettiest. Or why young girls wear the shortest shorts that leave the bum cheek exposed and give lots of old guys an eyeful! I've seen some sights this week - I've seen some terrible tattoos and I've seen a lot if guys with bigger breasts than me. Whilst you think you look lovely spare a thought for the other people out there who may not have eaten their lunch and for goodness sake deodorant is needed for a reason especially if you sit next to someone during the day or on the bus. I for one prefer the winter as I love thick wooly jumpers and boots and I always manage to keep hold of my lunch ......and my white bits!
